Easter Sunday
Today's Word:
Acts 10:34-43 ("Everyone who believes in (Jesus) will receive forgiveness of sins through his name")
Psalm 118:1-2, 16-17, 22-23 (This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad)
Colossians 3:1-4 ("Seek what is above")
or 1 Corinthians 5:6-8 ("Clear out the old yeast...let us celebrate the feast")
John 20:1-9 (The Resurrection according to John: Peter and John see the empty tomb)
or Mark 16:1-7 (The Resurrection according to Mark: "He has been raised; he is not here")
or Luke 24:13-35 (The Path to Emmaus)
Alleluia! He is risen!
He is risen! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!!
Mary Magdalene:
I have seen Him this day
I have walked with Him
I have talked with Him
And He nearly took my breath away
And now I want to tell everyone
So they may believe
Alleluia! He is risen!
He is risen! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!!
And when I saw Him
He called me by name
And I knew my Master once again
His voice was gentle
His eyes were so kind
He took the sorrow from my mind
I have seen Him! Alleluia!
He is risen! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!!
He was free again this day
Free from everything
That once had bound Him
Though the stone of Death was rolled away
And now He wants to see all his friends
So they will not grieve
So they may believe
Alleluia! He is risen!
He is risen! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!!
And when He saw them
He called them by name
And they knew their Master once again
His voice was gentle
His eyes were so kind
He took the sorrow from their minds
Alleluia! He is risen!
He is risen! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!!
Alleluia
Alleluia
Alleluia
Alleluia
--He Is Risen from "Truth of Truths" (1971)
words and music by Ray Ruff and Val Stoecklein
A blessed Easter to all who have passed this way! If you have been reading along with me since I started on February 22, a special prayer of thanksgiving to God for you for staying with me!
We have entered a new season of glory - God's glory in Jesus Christ!
It struck me over the last couple of days that the resurrection of Jesus offers assurance to us, and because of this, a boundless hope exists for all - a hope that withstands the doom and gloom that our 'experts' foretell about the world. This doesn't take away our troubles - but it gives us inspiration to help us overcome them; even to discovering the next innovative breakthrough!
Was there any hope among Jesus' disciples in the hours following his burial? It is hard to say. Obviously, nothing that may have been written to that regard survives to this day. It would seem that a mob-rule panic was setting in. The Jewish chief priests had incited the crowds to believe that Jesus had become the source of all their troubles. Would it end here? Or would his followers be hunted down and share a similar fate?
John indicates in his writings that the eleven remaining apostles (and most likely Jesus' mother, Mary, whose care had been entrusted to John) holed themselves up (read: nearly barricaded) in the upper room where only hours before they had been sharing the Passover Seder meal when those crazy things started happening and it all started to unravel. Then after the solemn observance of Passover, Mary Magdalene and other women went out to where Jesus had been buried, to look after the body as was the custom of the time. When they saw the stone sealing the tomb moved away, and the assigned guard not at his post, they became anxious. What could have happened?
Peter and John are told of this. They knew they were risking the possibility of being questioned, captured, or both. Yet they went immediately. John, being much younger, took off at a sprint and arrived first; but waited; by this time he was aware that Jesus had previously conferred on Peter the mantle of leadership. Peter and John ultimately verify what the women had first seen. John believes on this sight at once; but none of them had yet made the connection that the missing body was proof of all that had been foretold.
Meanwhile, two other disciples are leaving Jerusalem, perhaps in order to get out of town before more trouble starts. Emmaus, while not far, was far enough to be removed from the hustle and bustle of Jerusalem. These two disciples have lost hope; given up the ghost, as it were; with Jesus dead and buried, all that he had done was becoming little more than a bittersweet memory. Another traveler is about to overtake these two, but happens upon their conversation and is much interested in it, for he happens to be its subject.
Luke writes that over the remainder of the walk to Emmaus the three engage in serious and sometimes heated conversation over how the prophecies of the Old Testament referred to Jesus. When they get there, it's nearly sunset; but the first two are so wrapped up in conversation with the latecomer that they urge him to stay the night with them. So they prepare dinner; and while the blessing is said, Jesus reveals himself to the pair, and then vanishes! They return immediately to Jerusalem (perhaps even in record time for the period) where they discover that others have also realized that Jesus is risen, as he promised!
What tremendous hope has been given to us in the resurrection of Jesus! It completes the act of salvation started at his crucifixion, and is the fulfillment of God's presence among us!
----------
Over this week I will share with you my own figurative path to Emmaus as well as my return home, which will take us to the present. I'll also share with you an interesting story about the obscure song I posted -from memory- at the top of today's reflection.
But for today, we are again bathed again in the light of the risen Christ! As was said by (St.) Augustine of Hippo, we are Easter People - and Alleluia! is our song!!
Jesus Christ is risen today, Alleluia!
Our triumphant holy day, Alleluia!
Who did once, upon the cross, Alleluia!
Suffer to redeem our loss, Alleluia!
Hymns of praise then let us sing, Alleluia!
Unto Christ, our heavenly King, Alleluia!
Who endured the cross and grave, Alleluia!
Sinners to redeem and save, Alleluia!
But the pains which He endured, Alleluia!
Our salvation hath procured, Alleluia!
Now above the sky He’s king, Alleluia!
Where the angels ever sing, Alleluia!
Sing we to our God above, Alleluia!
Praise eternal as His love, Alleluia!
Praise Him, all you heavenly host, Alleluia!
Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, Alleluia!
--Jesus Christ is Risen Today (Easter Hymn, 14th Century, Surrexit Christus Hodie)
Translation: 18th Century (vs. 4 by Charles Wesley, 1740)
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
And While We're On The Subject
The whole "Anticipation" thing reminded me of the Carly Simon song...which reminded me of the Heinz Ketchup commercial...and there's a new take on it. (You may need to go to the website to see it.)
The Saturday Mourning Post
Holy Saturday
Today's Word:
(The 'Mother of All Vigils', after sunset)
Genesis 1:1 - 2:2 (Creation)
Psalm 104 or Psalm 33 (The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord)
Genesis 22:1-18 (Abraham's sacrifice)
Psalm 16: 5-11 (You are my inheritance, O Lord)
Exodus 14:15 - 15:18 (The Red Sea is parted; "Let us sing to the Lord, He has covered himself in glory")
Isaiah 54:5-14 (The One who has become your husband is your Maker)
Psalm 30:2-13 (I will praise you, Lord, for you have rescued me)
Isaiah 55:1-11 (All you who are thirsty, come to the water!)
Isaiah 12:2-6 (You will draw water joyfully from the springs of salvation)
Baruch 3:9-15 (found in the Apocrypha) (Learn where prudence is)
Psalm 19:8-11 (Lord, You have the words of everlasting life)
Ezekiel 36:16-28 (I will sprinkle clean water over you, to cleanse you from all your impurities)
Psalm 42:3 & 5; 43:3-4 (Like a deer that longs for running streams, my soul longs for the living God)
Psalm 51:12-19 (Create a clean heart in me, O God)
Romans 6:3-11 (Those baptized in Christ are baptized into his death, that we might also know the fullness of new life)
Psalm 118:1-2, 16-17, 22-23 (The stone which the builders rejected has become the cornerstone)
Mark 16:1-7 (The Resurrection according to Mark: "He has been raised; he is not here")
All this great stuff happens tonight.
In the ancient tradition of the early Christian Church, new initiates were brought into full community only once a year: at the all-night vigil proclaiming the resurrection of Jesus. Certainly half of the readings deal either with sacrifice or water.
There's yet another great symbol on display tonight: Fire.
From it is lit the great Paschal Candle, symbolizing the raised Christ, that which illuminates all darkness.
But for now, we must not forget that we are still in mourning. No liturgical service is held today in Catholic churches. That doesn't mean it's not busy: sanctuaries are being decorated with much color and brilliance to remove us from the austerity and introspection of Lent. Food baskets for Easter are now traditionally blessed at midday Saturday.
To get there, though, we must reconcile ourselves to God. We are not entities unto ourselves. Lent does not turn to Easter without turning from the past and looking to the future with hope.
Sometimes I wonder if my beating heart has a reason
The thought of breathing only takes my breath away
I've spent so many nights wrestling with this feeling
Do I have the strength to make it through the day
But I was never meant
To walk this road alone
I can always trust you
When you say
(Chorus:)
I will carry you
Be your strength
And pull you through
Reach for me
And take my hand
We will pray
And we will stand
In a world
Crying out for peace
Let your heart be strong
For when I am weak
You will carry me
Sometimes You wonder if the road you're on has a reason
It's hard to go on, when you just don't know
We can shoulder all the weight of life between us
Until the fear of what we cannot see is gone
Cause we were never meant
to walk this road alone
we are bound together
When we say...
(Repeat Chorus 2x)
--I Will Carry You (1999)
Michael W. Smith
Odd that the above song comes from my pivotal year of 1999...
We can never know about the days to come
but we think about them anyway.
And I wonder if I'm really with you now
or just chasing after some finer day.
Anticipation, Anticipation
is making me late
is keeping me waiting
And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet, i don't know nature's ways.
So I'll try and see into your eyes right now
and stay right here, 'cause these are the good old days.
--Anticipation (1971)
Carly Simon
Today's Word:
(The 'Mother of All Vigils', after sunset)
Genesis 1:1 - 2:2 (Creation)
Psalm 104 or Psalm 33 (The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord)
Genesis 22:1-18 (Abraham's sacrifice)
Psalm 16: 5-11 (You are my inheritance, O Lord)
Exodus 14:15 - 15:18 (The Red Sea is parted; "Let us sing to the Lord, He has covered himself in glory")
Isaiah 54:5-14 (The One who has become your husband is your Maker)
Psalm 30:2-13 (I will praise you, Lord, for you have rescued me)
Isaiah 55:1-11 (All you who are thirsty, come to the water!)
Isaiah 12:2-6 (You will draw water joyfully from the springs of salvation)
Baruch 3:9-15 (found in the Apocrypha) (Learn where prudence is)
Psalm 19:8-11 (Lord, You have the words of everlasting life)
Ezekiel 36:16-28 (I will sprinkle clean water over you, to cleanse you from all your impurities)
Psalm 42:3 & 5; 43:3-4 (Like a deer that longs for running streams, my soul longs for the living God)
Psalm 51:12-19 (Create a clean heart in me, O God)
Romans 6:3-11 (Those baptized in Christ are baptized into his death, that we might also know the fullness of new life)
Psalm 118:1-2, 16-17, 22-23 (The stone which the builders rejected has become the cornerstone)
Mark 16:1-7 (The Resurrection according to Mark: "He has been raised; he is not here")
All this great stuff happens tonight.
In the ancient tradition of the early Christian Church, new initiates were brought into full community only once a year: at the all-night vigil proclaiming the resurrection of Jesus. Certainly half of the readings deal either with sacrifice or water.
There's yet another great symbol on display tonight: Fire.
From it is lit the great Paschal Candle, symbolizing the raised Christ, that which illuminates all darkness.
But for now, we must not forget that we are still in mourning. No liturgical service is held today in Catholic churches. That doesn't mean it's not busy: sanctuaries are being decorated with much color and brilliance to remove us from the austerity and introspection of Lent. Food baskets for Easter are now traditionally blessed at midday Saturday.
To get there, though, we must reconcile ourselves to God. We are not entities unto ourselves. Lent does not turn to Easter without turning from the past and looking to the future with hope.
Sometimes I wonder if my beating heart has a reason
The thought of breathing only takes my breath away
I've spent so many nights wrestling with this feeling
Do I have the strength to make it through the day
But I was never meant
To walk this road alone
I can always trust you
When you say
(Chorus:)
I will carry you
Be your strength
And pull you through
Reach for me
And take my hand
We will pray
And we will stand
In a world
Crying out for peace
Let your heart be strong
For when I am weak
You will carry me
Sometimes You wonder if the road you're on has a reason
It's hard to go on, when you just don't know
We can shoulder all the weight of life between us
Until the fear of what we cannot see is gone
Cause we were never meant
to walk this road alone
we are bound together
When we say...
(Repeat Chorus 2x)
--I Will Carry You (1999)
Michael W. Smith
Odd that the above song comes from my pivotal year of 1999...
We can never know about the days to come
but we think about them anyway.
And I wonder if I'm really with you now
or just chasing after some finer day.
Anticipation, Anticipation
is making me late
is keeping me waiting
And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet, i don't know nature's ways.
So I'll try and see into your eyes right now
and stay right here, 'cause these are the good old days.
--Anticipation (1971)
Carly Simon
Friday, April 10, 2009
The Path to Nowhere
Ho-Ho Sanna Hey Sanna
Sanna Sanna Hosanna
Hey Sanna Ho and how
Hey JC, JC please explain to me
You had everything - where is it now?
--Andrew Lloyd Webber & Tim Rice
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere man, The world is at your command
He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere man, can you see me at all
Nowhere man don't worry
Take your time, no hurry
Leave it all till somebody else
Lends you a hand
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere man, The world is at your command
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
--Nowhere Man (1965)
John Lennon & Paul McCartney, The Beatles
Nearly every American has heard the term "March Madness." To most, it equates to the National Collegiate Athletic Association's annual basketball tournament. The term can also apply to the utter disgust we might feel over the weather, longing for lasting pleasantness to cure ourselves of cabin fever.
But to me, the endearing term is a reminder that 'the bunny rabbits IS coming'; that hippity-hoppity, Easter's on it's way. (Please forgive the apparent flippancy; it did bring a smile to my face as I typed it.) It's all the more 'maddening' when Easter falls in March or very early in April. Most years are taken in stride, without much to really get mad about. (But there's really nothing maddening about a basketball tournament, is there?)
The year 1999 was one huge exception.
The seeds were sown almost immediately after my ordination five years earlier.
The new bishop of Rockford was installed in June 1994. His first year as bishop was relatively uneventful. But as he got used to his new digs, the eventual shuffling of personnel took place. In June 1995 my pastor was reassigned and was made Vicar for Clergy and Religious. His replacement as pastor was a 60-ish priest who had no aspirations whatever to utilize me (or any other deacon for that matter - at least that's the impression he gave me in the beginning). His thoughts at the time were on retirement and how nice it would have been to retire from the parish he had just left.
As a deacon, I had not only responsibilities at the parish level, but also to the diocese. I was required to make an annual retreat. At the beginning it was just that. But everything would change. My former pastor, now supervising the clergy at large, through his own perception and with input (including some haplessly provided by yours truly), established a policy for continuing education - 20 hours of approved coursework related to ministry. Half of them could be fulfilled through the annual retreat. But the other half - well, the cart was put in front of the horse. There just wasn't a lot to pick from. Further, the new diaconate director - a deacon himself, whose day job was an educator in one of the public school districts - was no help. And if you follow the news, you'll understand that the Catholic Church is not all that keen on being innovative in the use of modern online technology. Enough of it was available in 1995 and onward that it would have done a diocese that covered the northern third of Illinois well to get connected online. But it didn't - and most likely still isn't.
It's not that I didn't want to fulfill the requirements. I wanted to do so in an efficient matter. Driving 120 miles or more every time I wanted to attend a class was not efficient. It put further demands on both time and treasure, both already under considerable stress with a tight personal economy and a special-needs child my wife and I had decided to educate at home. Nobody really cared about the talent part. And the course matter fell into the category with which I was becoming quite familiar: information that was for all practical purposes, useless.
As an example, it was also about this time that my son was to make his First Holy Communion. Mindful of the educational requirements to receive most sacraments, particulary the initiatory ones which include Holy Communion, we put our son in a Sunday School class. It would be an opportunity to determine how well he could manage in a group of his peers. He was excited at the prospect. But it only lasted two weeks. He was so excited about the goal that the catechist and her assistant couldn't cap our son's exuberance. I then went to the school's Director of Religious Education, who was sympathetic. She provided some material that could prepare him to receive Holy Communion when he was 'ready.' Unfortunately, this was too little and really too late. The way this was handled just opened another wound for my wife, and I agreed with her. At every turn it was looking like we'd have to come up with answers that fit neatly within the rules, and with no support of any kind.
More bad news. I learned very early in January 1999 that my employer had sold his business to big company competitor, who almost immediately announced that our facility would be closed. By October I would be out of work. There was no sympathy from the diocese, no offer of even extending deadlines due to the unusual circumstances I was under. With no hope on the horizon save a full-blown miracle, I was resigned to whatever fate I was handed. At the beginning of March I received a letter from the diocese. My faculties would expire on March 31; Good Friday that year. Hoping against hope, I had asked my pastor if I could at least serve out the Easter weekend. At first he agreed but reneged at the last minute.
All this hurt me deeply, but it wasn't over yet. I was torn between quietly getting back to music full time or leaving completely. Moreover, I was torn because I had tried doing what I felt was right in seeking compromise; but there would be none. I had given all I had, there was nothing left. As is, my family had been sacrificed at the altar of ministry without so much as even a sincere thank you. My wife was properly angry at all of this. I was frustrated, panicking, and at a total loss as to where to go. During the rest of 1999 I even tried to reassimilate, while hoping of finding any work that might be secure enough to survive while I got more real education. Every attempt met a dead-end.
By Thanksgiving 1999, I had lost my job as well as my desire to serve God. It was part of a chain of events that didn't turn around completely for the next three years.
Then I was inspired
Now I'm sad and tired
After all, I've tried for three years
Seems like ninety
Why then am I scared to finish what I started
What You started - I didn't start it
God - Thy will is hard
But You hold every card
I will drink your cup of poison!
Nail me to your cross and break me!
Bleed me, beat me!
Kill me! Take me now - before I change my mind!!!
I had all but lost my faith, and that was on unstable ground. I had serious questions about the practicality of it all. What I had left was my wife and son, and the love we shared. To be honest, I had taken that love for granted and I never should have done that. I grew from the experience and realized I had stretched myself too thin. Losing my job was in the end a good thing, because the institutional church had to take a back seat to it, whether or not anyone cared. We had to get this behind us if we were to have a roof over our heads and food on our table. And as this unfolded I promised myself I would keep my wife and son at the top of my priorities. In loving them and in compassion and respect for them I knew I was following God.
What also remained was my longtime friend Mike, who offered me a change of scenery on the spiritual landscape whenever I wanted it. He introduced me to another man whom I consider a friend, though I've now known him ten years and have never really called him such in person: Pastor Paul, at Cornerstone.
The story ends happily, though; and the rest of it follows in the more joyous season which we're about to enter.
Sanna Sanna Hosanna
Hey Sanna Ho and how
Hey JC, JC please explain to me
You had everything - where is it now?
--Andrew Lloyd Webber & Tim Rice
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere man, The world is at your command
He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere man, can you see me at all
Nowhere man don't worry
Take your time, no hurry
Leave it all till somebody else
Lends you a hand
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere man please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere man, The world is at your command
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
--Nowhere Man (1965)
John Lennon & Paul McCartney, The Beatles
Nearly every American has heard the term "March Madness." To most, it equates to the National Collegiate Athletic Association's annual basketball tournament. The term can also apply to the utter disgust we might feel over the weather, longing for lasting pleasantness to cure ourselves of cabin fever.
But to me, the endearing term is a reminder that 'the bunny rabbits IS coming'; that hippity-hoppity, Easter's on it's way. (Please forgive the apparent flippancy; it did bring a smile to my face as I typed it.) It's all the more 'maddening' when Easter falls in March or very early in April. Most years are taken in stride, without much to really get mad about. (But there's really nothing maddening about a basketball tournament, is there?)
The year 1999 was one huge exception.
The seeds were sown almost immediately after my ordination five years earlier.
The new bishop of Rockford was installed in June 1994. His first year as bishop was relatively uneventful. But as he got used to his new digs, the eventual shuffling of personnel took place. In June 1995 my pastor was reassigned and was made Vicar for Clergy and Religious. His replacement as pastor was a 60-ish priest who had no aspirations whatever to utilize me (or any other deacon for that matter - at least that's the impression he gave me in the beginning). His thoughts at the time were on retirement and how nice it would have been to retire from the parish he had just left.
As a deacon, I had not only responsibilities at the parish level, but also to the diocese. I was required to make an annual retreat. At the beginning it was just that. But everything would change. My former pastor, now supervising the clergy at large, through his own perception and with input (including some haplessly provided by yours truly), established a policy for continuing education - 20 hours of approved coursework related to ministry. Half of them could be fulfilled through the annual retreat. But the other half - well, the cart was put in front of the horse. There just wasn't a lot to pick from. Further, the new diaconate director - a deacon himself, whose day job was an educator in one of the public school districts - was no help. And if you follow the news, you'll understand that the Catholic Church is not all that keen on being innovative in the use of modern online technology. Enough of it was available in 1995 and onward that it would have done a diocese that covered the northern third of Illinois well to get connected online. But it didn't - and most likely still isn't.
It's not that I didn't want to fulfill the requirements. I wanted to do so in an efficient matter. Driving 120 miles or more every time I wanted to attend a class was not efficient. It put further demands on both time and treasure, both already under considerable stress with a tight personal economy and a special-needs child my wife and I had decided to educate at home. Nobody really cared about the talent part. And the course matter fell into the category with which I was becoming quite familiar: information that was for all practical purposes, useless.
As an example, it was also about this time that my son was to make his First Holy Communion. Mindful of the educational requirements to receive most sacraments, particulary the initiatory ones which include Holy Communion, we put our son in a Sunday School class. It would be an opportunity to determine how well he could manage in a group of his peers. He was excited at the prospect. But it only lasted two weeks. He was so excited about the goal that the catechist and her assistant couldn't cap our son's exuberance. I then went to the school's Director of Religious Education, who was sympathetic. She provided some material that could prepare him to receive Holy Communion when he was 'ready.' Unfortunately, this was too little and really too late. The way this was handled just opened another wound for my wife, and I agreed with her. At every turn it was looking like we'd have to come up with answers that fit neatly within the rules, and with no support of any kind.
More bad news. I learned very early in January 1999 that my employer had sold his business to big company competitor, who almost immediately announced that our facility would be closed. By October I would be out of work. There was no sympathy from the diocese, no offer of even extending deadlines due to the unusual circumstances I was under. With no hope on the horizon save a full-blown miracle, I was resigned to whatever fate I was handed. At the beginning of March I received a letter from the diocese. My faculties would expire on March 31; Good Friday that year. Hoping against hope, I had asked my pastor if I could at least serve out the Easter weekend. At first he agreed but reneged at the last minute.
All this hurt me deeply, but it wasn't over yet. I was torn between quietly getting back to music full time or leaving completely. Moreover, I was torn because I had tried doing what I felt was right in seeking compromise; but there would be none. I had given all I had, there was nothing left. As is, my family had been sacrificed at the altar of ministry without so much as even a sincere thank you. My wife was properly angry at all of this. I was frustrated, panicking, and at a total loss as to where to go. During the rest of 1999 I even tried to reassimilate, while hoping of finding any work that might be secure enough to survive while I got more real education. Every attempt met a dead-end.
By Thanksgiving 1999, I had lost my job as well as my desire to serve God. It was part of a chain of events that didn't turn around completely for the next three years.
Then I was inspired
Now I'm sad and tired
After all, I've tried for three years
Seems like ninety
Why then am I scared to finish what I started
What You started - I didn't start it
God - Thy will is hard
But You hold every card
I will drink your cup of poison!
Nail me to your cross and break me!
Bleed me, beat me!
Kill me! Take me now - before I change my mind!!!
I had all but lost my faith, and that was on unstable ground. I had serious questions about the practicality of it all. What I had left was my wife and son, and the love we shared. To be honest, I had taken that love for granted and I never should have done that. I grew from the experience and realized I had stretched myself too thin. Losing my job was in the end a good thing, because the institutional church had to take a back seat to it, whether or not anyone cared. We had to get this behind us if we were to have a roof over our heads and food on our table. And as this unfolded I promised myself I would keep my wife and son at the top of my priorities. In loving them and in compassion and respect for them I knew I was following God.
What also remained was my longtime friend Mike, who offered me a change of scenery on the spiritual landscape whenever I wanted it. He introduced me to another man whom I consider a friend, though I've now known him ten years and have never really called him such in person: Pastor Paul, at Cornerstone.
The story ends happily, though; and the rest of it follows in the more joyous season which we're about to enter.
Love's Servant Sacrificed
Good Friday
Today's Word:
Isaiah 52:13 - 53:12 (Fourth Song of the Servant: "It was OUR infirmities that he bore, OUR sufferings that he endured...by his stripes WE are healed")
Psalm 31:2, 6, 12-17, 25 (Into your hands I commend my spirit)
Hebrews 4:14-16; 5:7-9 (The Son of God 'learned' obedience from what he suffered)
John 18:1 - 19:42 (The Passion according to John: ("Everyone on the side of truth listens to Me")
"And you passersby, look at me! Have you ever seen anything like this?
Ever seen pain like my pain, seen what he did to me, what God did to me in his rage?"
(Lamentations 1:12; "The Message")
Why is it "Good?"
Jesus was ultimately seen as a criminal in the eyes of those of that day who put him to death. Not only does John's account of the events cast serious aspersions on the criminal justice system (now as well as then), but it literally begs the question of God's justice. Why would Divinity put part of Himself, His very nature, through trial and such torture?
We have no comprehension, not one semblance of an idea of the stuff and substance of the torture inflicted on the man Jesus. I certainly don't. I won't even try to get graphic about it, because the mere thought of having to describe it is more than a little unsettling. But if we can try to look at it by getting into Jesus' head for a moment, such as it were, we can walk away with another glimpse of just how important this singular event was.
Yes, there was physical pain of excruciating intensity. And it went on for six long hours. But there was psychological pain of similar intensity taking place as well. And Jesus is the Son of God! In his divinity he knew this was going to happen; and yet in his humanity he prayed that it might not. While replaying the events of his life in his own mind, he cried out aloud in his anguish the words of Psalm 22: "My God, why did you dump me miles from nowhere? Why have you abandoned me??"
Yet God was with him. God was in him. He is God personified!
Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Oh! Sometimes it causes me to tremble...
Jesus' disciples, the Apostles, the Church fathers, hundreds of theologians, and other writers from every corner of the world have tried to wrap our heads around this for centuries - that God took such a drastic step because anything less would not have been believed, could not have held up after all this time. Remember nearly two weeks ago? The gospel passage included John 3:16; the part about God loving us so much that He sent His Son. He wanted to live among us, not apart from us.
Adam and Eve fell because they succumbed to temptation, wanting to be more like God. Humanity experiences a growing realization of their ability to create: not just the technological and scientific advances, but creating life itself! We cannot become God, but God is with us and in us, and has become one like us!
And we call this day "Good" because not even death can separate us from God's divine love! This instrument of our demise is the gateway, the only gateway, to what awaits us!
For rebirth or resurrection to happen, death has to take place. For a phoenix to rise, it must die and burn to ashes in fire.
CHRIST IS MY PHOENIX!! He calls me and beckons me to follow him. He stretches out his hand to me when I fall, as he stretched his hand to one repentant man hanging with him; saying to him, "This day you will join me in paradise." It matters not what my rational mind has thought, or what ill-thought actions came about. He continues to call to me, and if I let him remain part of my life any and all things are possible!
Sometimes the night was beautiful
Sometimes the sky was so far away
Sometimes it seemed to stoop so close
You could touch it but your heart would break
Sometimes the morning came too soon
Sometimes the day could be so hot
There was so much work left to do
But so much You'd already done
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
And I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
Sometimes I think of Abraham
How one star he saw had been lit for me
He was a stranger in this land
And I am that, no less than he
And on this road to righteousness
Sometimes the climb can be so steep
I may falter in my steps
But never beyond Your reach
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night . . .)
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(. . . Was beautiful)
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(So beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Oh God, you are my God)
And I will follow You all of my days
--Sometimes by Step (1996)
Rich Mullins (1955-1997)
Today's Word:
Isaiah 52:13 - 53:12 (Fourth Song of the Servant: "It was OUR infirmities that he bore, OUR sufferings that he endured...by his stripes WE are healed")
Psalm 31:2, 6, 12-17, 25 (Into your hands I commend my spirit)
Hebrews 4:14-16; 5:7-9 (The Son of God 'learned' obedience from what he suffered)
John 18:1 - 19:42 (The Passion according to John: ("Everyone on the side of truth listens to Me")
"And you passersby, look at me! Have you ever seen anything like this?
Ever seen pain like my pain, seen what he did to me, what God did to me in his rage?"
(Lamentations 1:12; "The Message")
Why is it "Good?"
Jesus was ultimately seen as a criminal in the eyes of those of that day who put him to death. Not only does John's account of the events cast serious aspersions on the criminal justice system (now as well as then), but it literally begs the question of God's justice. Why would Divinity put part of Himself, His very nature, through trial and such torture?
We have no comprehension, not one semblance of an idea of the stuff and substance of the torture inflicted on the man Jesus. I certainly don't. I won't even try to get graphic about it, because the mere thought of having to describe it is more than a little unsettling. But if we can try to look at it by getting into Jesus' head for a moment, such as it were, we can walk away with another glimpse of just how important this singular event was.
Yes, there was physical pain of excruciating intensity. And it went on for six long hours. But there was psychological pain of similar intensity taking place as well. And Jesus is the Son of God! In his divinity he knew this was going to happen; and yet in his humanity he prayed that it might not. While replaying the events of his life in his own mind, he cried out aloud in his anguish the words of Psalm 22: "My God, why did you dump me miles from nowhere? Why have you abandoned me??"
Yet God was with him. God was in him. He is God personified!
Were you there when they crucified my Lord?
Oh! Sometimes it causes me to tremble...
Jesus' disciples, the Apostles, the Church fathers, hundreds of theologians, and other writers from every corner of the world have tried to wrap our heads around this for centuries - that God took such a drastic step because anything less would not have been believed, could not have held up after all this time. Remember nearly two weeks ago? The gospel passage included John 3:16; the part about God loving us so much that He sent His Son. He wanted to live among us, not apart from us.
Adam and Eve fell because they succumbed to temptation, wanting to be more like God. Humanity experiences a growing realization of their ability to create: not just the technological and scientific advances, but creating life itself! We cannot become God, but God is with us and in us, and has become one like us!
And we call this day "Good" because not even death can separate us from God's divine love! This instrument of our demise is the gateway, the only gateway, to what awaits us!
For rebirth or resurrection to happen, death has to take place. For a phoenix to rise, it must die and burn to ashes in fire.
CHRIST IS MY PHOENIX!! He calls me and beckons me to follow him. He stretches out his hand to me when I fall, as he stretched his hand to one repentant man hanging with him; saying to him, "This day you will join me in paradise." It matters not what my rational mind has thought, or what ill-thought actions came about. He continues to call to me, and if I let him remain part of my life any and all things are possible!
Sometimes the night was beautiful
Sometimes the sky was so far away
Sometimes it seemed to stoop so close
You could touch it but your heart would break
Sometimes the morning came too soon
Sometimes the day could be so hot
There was so much work left to do
But so much You'd already done
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
And I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
Sometimes I think of Abraham
How one star he saw had been lit for me
He was a stranger in this land
And I am that, no less than he
And on this road to righteousness
Sometimes the climb can be so steep
I may falter in my steps
But never beyond Your reach
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night . . .)
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(. . . Was beautiful)
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
(So beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Oh God, you are my God)
And I will follow You all of my days
--Sometimes by Step (1996)
Rich Mullins (1955-1997)
Thursday, April 9, 2009
"Do This In Remembrance of Me"
Holy (Maundy) Thursday
"Do This In Remembrance of Me"
Today's Word:
(Evening Mass of the Lord's Last Supper)
Exodus 12:1-14 (The institution of the Jewish Passover)
Psalm 116:12-18 (The cup of salvation I will take up)
1 Corinthians 11:23-26 (As often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the death of the Lord until he comes)
John 13:1-15 (Jesus washes his disciples' feet: "As I have done for you, you should also do")
Nothing has touched the character of this evening more clearly to me than something completely out of left field...written by a well known country music singer, under totally different circumstances; covered years later by a soul diva, again under different circumstances...
JESUS:
If I should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go
But I know
I'll be with you
Every step of the way
And I will always love you
Bittersweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So goodbye
Please don't cry
(to JUDAS) We both know I'm not what you believe in
But I will always love you
(Interlude)
I hope life treats you kind
And I know you'll have all you dreamed of
And I give to you joy and happiness
But above all this
I give you love....
(The scene now changes - a lone robed figure is kneeling before a life-sized cross...)
(Soloist:)
And I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always...
Love...
You...
--I Will Always Love You (1973)
Dolly Parton
Still to come:
Look at all my trials and tribulations
Sinking in a gentle pool of wine
Don't disturb me now - I can see the answers
'Til this evening is this morning life is fine
Always hoped that I'd be an apostle
Knew that I would make it if I tried
Then when we retire we can write the gospels
So they'll still talk about us when we've died...
--The Last Supper (excerpt) from Jesus Christ Superstar (1970)
Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice
"Do This In Remembrance of Me"
Today's Word:
(Evening Mass of the Lord's Last Supper)
Exodus 12:1-14 (The institution of the Jewish Passover)
Psalm 116:12-18 (The cup of salvation I will take up)
1 Corinthians 11:23-26 (As often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the death of the Lord until he comes)
John 13:1-15 (Jesus washes his disciples' feet: "As I have done for you, you should also do")
Nothing has touched the character of this evening more clearly to me than something completely out of left field...written by a well known country music singer, under totally different circumstances; covered years later by a soul diva, again under different circumstances...
JESUS:
If I should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go
But I know
I'll be with you
Every step of the way
And I will always love you
Bittersweet memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So goodbye
Please don't cry
(to JUDAS) We both know I'm not what you believe in
But I will always love you
(Interlude)
I hope life treats you kind
And I know you'll have all you dreamed of
And I give to you joy and happiness
But above all this
I give you love....
(The scene now changes - a lone robed figure is kneeling before a life-sized cross...)
(Soloist:)
And I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always...
Love...
You...
--I Will Always Love You (1973)
Dolly Parton
Still to come:
Look at all my trials and tribulations
Sinking in a gentle pool of wine
Don't disturb me now - I can see the answers
'Til this evening is this morning life is fine
Always hoped that I'd be an apostle
Knew that I would make it if I tried
Then when we retire we can write the gospels
So they'll still talk about us when we've died...
--The Last Supper (excerpt) from Jesus Christ Superstar (1970)
Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
King of the Hill
We returned from Wisconsin just over two hours ago.
It was a very pleasant trip - the weather most cooperative, no traffic detours, and no worries about stopping every twenty minutes or so (those who know my wife and I well understand why this is).
We took a very light breakfast with us, which we ate at a state park along the way. With about fifteen miles to go, we hit the last outpost of civilization - a McDonald's - where we bought coffees and nursed them for the remainder of the trip.
On arrival in the general area, my wife made the observation that there was much in the way of perceivable signs of life; something she had not quite expected.
The church itself is huge; one can see it for miles around on a clear day. We made our way inside and went to the chapel to make our prayer and offering. After about ten minutes, my wife set outside to stroll the grounds; she had wanted a few minutes to herself, so son and I remained in the chapel and I began to say the Rosary, a Catholic devotional prayer. (One good thing about Catholic forms of prayer - they're great when you are at a loss for words.) While I was doing this, I felt assured that our purposes in making the 225-mile round trip were not in vain. There is still something very energetic about the place, and with nature beginning to burst forth in the splendor of spring, it is adding to the immense feeling of serenity I drew. I am ready to move on.
I intend to make two posts on Good Friday. One is about the day itself. I cannot in all righteousness let this day pass and write only about myself. While it is important that I finish telling my story, and while I can draw similarities, they pale in comparison to the fullness of that day.
--------------------------------
Soapbox Moment
Okay - before we get to the Main Events, I have just the slightest of rants. I realize I'm most likely the only one of about twenty people who see the pitfall, and I don't know how to manage it other than to chalk it up to the company I am among at the time.
Like Ash Wednesday nearly fifty days ago, Good Friday is a day of fasting and abstinence for Catholics between ages 14 and 60. The guidelines suggest "one full meatless meal and two light meatless meals." Remember at the beginning of this series when I asked if a Snickers bar and a Red Bull constituted a light meatless meal? In this crowd that question becomes a bit more real.
On Good Friday, the Catholic choir I'm in gives a performance of Theodor DuBois' The Seven Last Words of Christ at mid-afternoon. Later in the evening is the liturgical observance of Christ's passion and death, at which we also sing. There's roughly a 2-1/2 hour layover between the concert and the service; time to kill as it's impractical to drive home and back. So most of us go out and have a social dinner.
I am not against the idea of the social gathering. It's actually better at this time than a Christmas party on a separate date. However, this tends to throw the spirit of the day out the window with the holy water. Dinner is far from austere. The non-meat choices are extremely limited; the portion sizes are large enough that just looking at them has me gaining a couple of pounds; and the alcohol tends to flow freely. Madame Director is Catholic enough to know that something about all this doesn't quite meet muster, but it happens anyway. How close to a near occasion of sin does one need to reach?
None of that sets well with me. Adding watching my diet to the list makes it worse. I don't want to appear antisocial; alternative meal choices are virtually nonexistent; and what else would I do for 2-1/2 hours waiting? What would you do? What would Jesus do??
I'll say this much and leave it alone - it won't be anywhere near the same wonderful feeling I had as I left the Hill today. It will help me get through that very awkward time.
It was a very pleasant trip - the weather most cooperative, no traffic detours, and no worries about stopping every twenty minutes or so (those who know my wife and I well understand why this is).
We took a very light breakfast with us, which we ate at a state park along the way. With about fifteen miles to go, we hit the last outpost of civilization - a McDonald's - where we bought coffees and nursed them for the remainder of the trip.
On arrival in the general area, my wife made the observation that there was much in the way of perceivable signs of life; something she had not quite expected.
The church itself is huge; one can see it for miles around on a clear day. We made our way inside and went to the chapel to make our prayer and offering. After about ten minutes, my wife set outside to stroll the grounds; she had wanted a few minutes to herself, so son and I remained in the chapel and I began to say the Rosary, a Catholic devotional prayer. (One good thing about Catholic forms of prayer - they're great when you are at a loss for words.) While I was doing this, I felt assured that our purposes in making the 225-mile round trip were not in vain. There is still something very energetic about the place, and with nature beginning to burst forth in the splendor of spring, it is adding to the immense feeling of serenity I drew. I am ready to move on.
I intend to make two posts on Good Friday. One is about the day itself. I cannot in all righteousness let this day pass and write only about myself. While it is important that I finish telling my story, and while I can draw similarities, they pale in comparison to the fullness of that day.
--------------------------------
Soapbox Moment
Okay - before we get to the Main Events, I have just the slightest of rants. I realize I'm most likely the only one of about twenty people who see the pitfall, and I don't know how to manage it other than to chalk it up to the company I am among at the time.
Like Ash Wednesday nearly fifty days ago, Good Friday is a day of fasting and abstinence for Catholics between ages 14 and 60. The guidelines suggest "one full meatless meal and two light meatless meals." Remember at the beginning of this series when I asked if a Snickers bar and a Red Bull constituted a light meatless meal? In this crowd that question becomes a bit more real.
On Good Friday, the Catholic choir I'm in gives a performance of Theodor DuBois' The Seven Last Words of Christ at mid-afternoon. Later in the evening is the liturgical observance of Christ's passion and death, at which we also sing. There's roughly a 2-1/2 hour layover between the concert and the service; time to kill as it's impractical to drive home and back. So most of us go out and have a social dinner.
I am not against the idea of the social gathering. It's actually better at this time than a Christmas party on a separate date. However, this tends to throw the spirit of the day out the window with the holy water. Dinner is far from austere. The non-meat choices are extremely limited; the portion sizes are large enough that just looking at them has me gaining a couple of pounds; and the alcohol tends to flow freely. Madame Director is Catholic enough to know that something about all this doesn't quite meet muster, but it happens anyway. How close to a near occasion of sin does one need to reach?
None of that sets well with me. Adding watching my diet to the list makes it worse. I don't want to appear antisocial; alternative meal choices are virtually nonexistent; and what else would I do for 2-1/2 hours waiting? What would you do? What would Jesus do??
I'll say this much and leave it alone - it won't be anywhere near the same wonderful feeling I had as I left the Hill today. It will help me get through that very awkward time.
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